I Might Get Up and Go Jogging Today

I Might Get Up and Go Jogging Today

I might win the lottery.  Same odds.

If I was Murdered Right Now, My Chalk Outline Would Be a Circle

If I was Murdered Right Now, My Chalk Outline Would Be a Circle

I need to get in shape.

Fitbit?

Fitbit?

No thanks.  If I wanted to be incessantly nagger about my life decisions I'd just call me mom.

I wanted to to lose 10 pounds this year. Only 13 to go.

I wanted to to lose 10 pounds this year.  Only 13 to go.

I Make My Daughter Wear My Fitbit During Her Soccer Games

I Make My Daughter Wear My Fitbit During Her Soccer Games

While I sit on the sideline eating snacks.

Yeah, I Do Yoga

Yeah, I Do Yoga

It's called shaving my legs.

My Stomach Auto-Corrected to "Cupcakes"

My Brain Said "Cardio"

My Stomach Auto-Corrected to "Cupcakes"

Don't Blame The Holidays. You Were Fat In August.

Don't Blame The Holidays.  You Were Fat In August.

Squats Down To Look In Fridge - Fitness

Squats Down To Look In Fridge - Fitness

Fitness Is Like Marriage

Fitness Is Like Marriage

You can't cheat on it and expect it to work.

Guy With a Six Pack...of Rolls

Guy With a Six Pack...of Rolls

I Don't Always Go To The Gym But When I Do...

I Don't Always Go To The Gym But When I Do...

I have no idea what I'm doing.

A guy with his head under the leg pad on the leg lift machine at the gym.

Monday Morning Workouts Are Always The Hardest

Monday Morning Workouts Are Always The Hardest

A woman crawling on a treadmill.

A Pair of Jeans Fresh From the Dryer

Anyone who says that I don't exercise has obviously never watched me put on a pair of jeans fresh from the dryer.

If It Wasn't For My Incredible Will Power, I Would Be Exercising Right Now

If It Wasn't For My Incredible Will Power, I Would Be Exercising Right Now

Lesson Learned

Rabbits jump and they live for 8 years.
Dogs walk and they live for 15 years.
Turtles do nothing and they live for 150 years.

Lesson Learned

If You Can Dream It, You Can Achieve It

If You Can Dream It, You Can Achieve It

An ice cube arm curling match sticks with Life Savers as weights on the end.  As it works out it looks at a motivational poster of the Titanic sinking.  The caption on the poster reads, "If you can dream it, you can achieve it."

I'm In Shape. Unfortunately It's The Wrong One.

I'm In Shape.  Unfortunately It's The Wrong One.